The Miscellanist

Sleeping in heavenly peace might be a stretch at our house

I’m sure readers out there have been itching for a good husband post…this is your lucky day.

 

The husband & I have all sorts of negotiations regarding the temperature at night.  I’m pretty much always cold during the day.  But something crazy happens at night & I become a furnace. 

 

I think it’s because my parents never ran the heater at night…ever.  I’ve awakened to the sight of my breath more than once on a chilly morning.  Further, our heater had a timer so it started up about 6:30AM every morning.  It was kind of a great way to wake up.  I hardly needed an alarm clock.  The downside, however, is that I still respond to that alarm clock. So if the furnace kicks on at 12AM, I feel like it’s time to get up. 

 

My husband clearly grew up in the lap of luxury & is accustomed to having a consistent temperature day & night.  Thus, the no furnace at night policy keeps him too cold to sleep.

 

If my parents emphasized one thing to us it was a holy fear of carbon monoxide & salmonella poisoning.  So if the heat itself wasn’t enough, the fear of dying a premature (albeit peaceful) death meant that I just wasn’t going to be able to give in on the issue.  I’ve made such a stink about it all that he’s given in quite a bit on the nightly temperature war.  

 

However, we’ve struck a deal that seems to work for both of us.  I sleep on his side of the bed until he comes to bed (which is about 3 or 4 hours after me) at which time I move over to my side.  It’s great for him because the bed is warm already.  And it’s great for me because it cools me off again to move to a new side.

 

I’m a fairly deep sleeper so I really don’t wake up when it’s time to move to my side of the bed.  However, there have been a few nights when I’ve been so deeply asleep that the husband has trouble convincing me to make room for him.

 

The other night we were talking about this because apparently, the previous night, he had to rely on brute force alone to make room for himself.

 

And then he said with 100% seriousness:  I’m trying to train you to move over when I do this (he squeezed my right leg just above the knee.

 

Yes, readers, the husband is trying to elicit a Pavolovian Response.  What’s next?  Dog food?

Recipe Nightmares: Caramel-Filled Donut Holes

A lot of bloggers post recipes & their positive experiences with cooking.  I would like to take a different spin & start posting about unsuccessful recipes since that will be much easier for me.

 

Martha Stewart has been so inspirational in modern home-making.  However, it’s only been in recent years that her recipes have become feasible.  I had a lot of failed Martha-recipes in the 90’s.  Some I’ll credit to my inexperience…but I think a lot of it had to do with how complicated the recipes were.  Fortunately, that’s changed to a large degree.  However, every once in a while an old, complicated one creeps in, just to, I think, remind us of how inadequate we are next to Martha.

 

Caramel-Filled Donut Holes, from Everyday Food, is one of those.  I made these for our office Halloween party…because I had the ingredients on hand during my grocery shopping fast.  My grandmother used to make donuts for me when I was little so I thought it would be kind of special to carry on her donut-making legacy.  I now know that this is not in the cards for me.

I had 2 major problems with the recipe:

 

First, I couldn’t get the oil hot enough to melt the caramel without incinerating the donut so I had to go for non-melted caramels.  I think this could easily be remedied by substituting rolos for the caramels since they’re so much softer…or microwaving them immediately before serving.

 

However, the 2^nd problem might be insurmountable.  The holes had a tendency to crack in the deep frying & expel their caramels…to stink & burn in the hot oil.  I would never have anticipating how disgusting a burning caramel would be.

 

I knew that these were kind of a stinker.  But I had no options but to take them to the potluck.  Knowing their inferior quality, I went to drastic efforts to ensure that no one knew what I brought to the potluck.

 

I will say that the donuts were impressive looking…which resulted in them being liberally snatched up at the potluck.   But I can confirm from an independent source that their virtue ended there. 

 

I was sitting at a table eating with several co-workers.  One had one of the donuts on her plate.  She was talking to the lady next to her about how cute they were.  She said fairly loudly, “These are just adorable!  I wonder who made them.  Do you know?”

 

It is hard for me to walk away from a compliment, but I reminded myself that she hadn’t actually eaten it yet.  So I said nothing.  And no one else seemed to know.

 

A while later, her plate was clean except for ½ a donut.  Another coworker was clearing plates & offered to take hers but questioned why she didn’t’ finish the donut.  “It’s a little dry” she whispered.  …that was an understatement.

 

The recipe is here…if you dare.

Parking Problems, Part Deux

And here I write an unprecedented two parking-related posts in one day...and exciting life I lead.

 

My commute last night was insane due to all the inbound traffic for Monday Night Football…a game which I don’t even want to talk about!  Grr!

 

Anyway, as I was sitting in traffic, I thought about how strange it was to be experiencing so much traffic considering I don’t work anywhere near the stadium…but my drive is fairly close to where people have to park to go to games…which is also no where near the stadium.  Seriously, why do people put up with parking all the way at Auraria? 

 

It had me completely convinced to take the bus (which drops you off at the front entrance) when the husband & I go to the game in a few weeks. 

Customer Appreciation is a bad omen

My parking garage is having “Customer Appreciation Day” today & gave away free water bottles.  I’m so suspicious of the parking garage industry that I only have one thought, “They’re about to raise rates!”  I even thought of asking this as I was handed by water bottle.

 

This is the best parking garage situation I’ve had since working downtown.  It’s only $6/day, across the street from my building & they never run out of spaces.

 

But it looks to be short-lived if my pessimism counts for anything.

Fringe & Numb3rs

I got some bad news via Entertainment Weekly last week:

 

Numb3rs has had their season cut to 16 episodes, a decision which likely means that this will be the 6^th and final season for the previously blogged about ever-improving drama.

 

I’m so sad about this as I’ve been largely unsuccessful at recruiting new viewers to this show who were turned off by the poor quality of some of the earlier seasons.

 

In other distressing news, Fringe hit an all time viewership low last week.   FOX insists that it is committed to the show…but it’s not looking pretty.  The Thursday night time slot is just killing this show.  However, it does make a good excuse for the poor numbers.  I fear that if the show was moved to another night & viewership didn’t immediately improve, it would get the axe for sure. 

Grocery Store Challenge Update & a word about potato & onion storage

I thought I should give an update on the October Grocery Challenge.  I’m proud to report that it was a huge success.  The husband went to the store twice to replenish the exception items that were on the list (milk, bananas, etc).  We did have to add lettuce to that list because it froze. 

The actual going to the store to purchase everything for a month was completely overwhelming & I almost had a meltdown in the cereal aisle.  In addition to being completely exhausting, it was an eye-opening amount of money to spend upfront.  It made me feel even more nauseous about the money I’d been spending previous months.

It was very hard at the beginning to avoid the store.  But the longer I kept at it, the more I enjoyed not shopping.  Although I did set foot in the grocery store 3 times for church supplies & once for my parents.  I considered it a real breakthrough on Sunday (though technically Nov 1), because I needed buttermilk for a recipe & what I had bought had gone bad.  I picked up my purse to run to Safeway but instead turned to the internet for a buttermilk substitute (1C of milk & 1 TBSP of white vinegar – who knew?). 

What really made the month a success was creating a meal plan & sticking to it.  I think I’m going to try & shop every other week from now on that way it’s easier to maintain fresh foods.

And on a food/grocery related topic, did you know that you shouldn’t store onions & potatoes near each other?  I read this in Everyday Foods Magazine…with I should mention, no explanation of why…so I did a little internet research:

Apparently the gasses in each make both rot more quickly.  Both should be stored in a cool, dark place in a breathable, non-plastic bin.  I’ve invested in bins & left the onions where they’ve always been stored.  In my small space, I’m having trouble finding another available, dark place for the potatoes which are currently sitting next to the not-so-cool/dark toaster oven.

I found it enlightening so I thought I’d share.

Non-Voter

So for the first time I can remember, I missed Election Day.  I don’t know what happened to me.  I knew it was coming up (though there weren’t many big issues/races where I live); I got the ballot in the mail; I saw all the yard signs.  But somehow I just didn’t make the connection with actual voting.

 

It’s a total bummer because I’ve been a very consistent voter.  I mean, I’ve voted in Primaries where the races were uncontested!  I once told my sister I wasn't sure I could speak to her again because she didn't vote.

Snap Judgment

 

So I’ve been called out for a lack of blog posts lately.  I’m not sure if this one is inspired enough for a big “comeback” but nevertheless, here it is.

 

Yesterday, while turning the pages of Entertainment Weekly, I came across a review for Eating Animals, the new book by Jonathan Safran Foer.  I was completely excited.  I had no idea that Foer was even working on a book.  As I read the review, my interest quickly faded.  Eating Animals is a non-fiction book about Foer’s path to vegetarianism.

 

According to the review, the bulk of his argument stems from the atrocities of industrial farming practices…which at this point I don’t think are a secret to anyone. 

 

I wonder if before writing this book, Foer wondered how successful he’d be at getting his message out, or if he even cared about reaching the masses.   It seems to me like Foer might be simply appealing to his liberal Upper East Side, Jewish cohorts & neighbors who are already educated on this issue & likely in agreement.  I mean, talk about grandstanding.   

 

There are tons of people, like Foer, who have converted to vegetarian/veganism, in a very elitist, militant way.  This is why I’m so supportive of Mark Bittman.  He’s very educated on the issues but still eats meat (albeit less frequently) and recognizes that others will do the same.  And I think he’s doing a better job at reaching the average American.

 

To me, Foer highlights a growing & dangerous divide between so-called compassion & responsibility when it comes to food. I think going at the issue from the compassion standpoint (as is alleged Foer does) undercuts the serious issues of food safety.  Certainly, large scale food production (at almost every level) needs a major overhaul for safety’s sake.

Instant Karma

This morning something happened that I’ve been wanting to see for a long time:  instant karma.

 

I was pretty sick over the weekend & thus caught a lot on TV including a segment on the CBS Sunday Morning Show about how everyone thinks they’re a good driver…when actually not many of us are…the Lake Woebegone effect.

 

Anyway, I was thinking at the time that I must be outside the majority because I really don’t think I’m that great of a driver.  I’m slow & defensive to a fault.  But I feel like I’m relatively safe.  My driving doesn’t save me much time, but it doesn’t take years off my life either!

 

Anyway, because I’m so slow, I’m always getting cut off by erratic drivers.  I do my best not to be an emotional driver, but I’ve always hoped that someday, instant karma would strike one of these offenders.  I mean, the way some people drive, I know they can’t go very long without causing an accident or getting a ticket…and I just kind of wanted to see it!

 

Well, today I got my wish.  I was driving down Alameda Pkwy, and a driver squeezed right in front of me for no apparent reason other than to tail the car that was formerly in front of me (since the lane he came from was completely empty & there was no where to turn for several blocks at least.  Anyway, he was still in front of me as we made a left turn onto Union Blvd & had the misfortune of ending up a few cars behind the #3 bus…which makes about 5 local stops on Union before Cold Springs PnR. 

 

The first 3 cars were able to speed up, change lanes & get around the bus as he stopped in front of the gas station.  The offending driver was car #4 who would not have time to do this & would just have to wait & follow the bus for a few blocks…but feeling that the entire universe was on his side, meaning a lane full of drivers would come to a screeching halt to let him in, he attempted to swerve over to the other lane without regard for the cars there.   Unfortunately, he was about a foot shy of clearing the bus.  His car spun around, blocking the open lane of traffic, but fortunately, no other cars were hit. 

 

I know from the experiences of others that the buses are pretty safe in a non-moving accident & I doubt the passengers really even felt it.  So it was almost victimless karma which made me feel better about feeling so vindictive. 

 

What I wanted to do was pull over & tell the driver that I totally saw this coming with his frenetic driving…but instead, I pulled into the gas station & went out the other side to avoid the accident.

Out with the old, in with the new

 

Today I made a big switch.  My beloved etsy purse, for which I’ve received numerous compliments, started to die a few weeks ago.  The straps are starting to crack & it’s starting to develop a little whole in the bottom.

 

So I made the difficult decision to move on.  This was tough.  I’m a one bag kind of girl.  I’ve carried that same purse every day in the year & a half that I’ve had it.  No cheating with matching or fancy purses no matter what the occasion.  I’ve actually thought about my old purse today & felt a little sad that it’s home alone, forever.

 

That’s not to say that I loved everything about it.  It was a little too small for me.  And the gravitation force on my cell phone to the very bottom of the bag was extra-strong.  So having learned a few things along the way, I found another great bag on etsy & a seller who was willing to customize the bag. 

 

I sort of wish this bag was vinyl like the old one because I think it made it look less crafty…but after watching some disturbing episodes of Dr. Oz, I really want to be able to throw the bag in the washing machine ever now & then.

Original Miscellany

Some interesting miscellany from my day calendar:

 

Transcendentalism sinks God and nature in man.

Materialism sinks God and nature in the universe.

Atheism sinks the will of God and man in the movement of destiny.

Pantheism sinks man and nature in God.

---William B. Greene c 1896

 

 

Forbes.com’s list of tools that have “most impacted human civilization”

The knife	The watch
The abacus	The lathe
The compass	The needle
The pencil	The candle
The harness	The scale
The scythe	The pot
The rifle	The telescope
The sword	The level
Eyeglasses	The fish hook
The saw	The chisel

Seasonal Angst

I’ve been really fighting the end of summer.  The last half of the summer was super-busy & went way too fast for me.  Not to mention, I had to work numerous nights & weekends.  And we never really had those really hot days like last summer.  To me, it doesn’t feel like summer came & went…it feels like it never really came.

 

But try as I may to resist it, fall is definitely here.  I’m still not excited about it.  I think maybe in a month, I’ll be ready to look at Aspen trees but it will be far too late.

 

I’ve been trying to think of what to do to improve my attitude since the seasons are obviously not going to adjust to my preferences.  And then the other day, I was flipping through a catalog & saw a page with Christmas decorations over a fireplace.  And all of a sudden, I’m ready for Christmas.  I’m so excited.  All I can think about are Christmas gifts, foods & crafts. 

 

I’m not so sure how I feel about all that lies between Christmas & me:  the fall, Halloween, Thanksgiving…but at least I have something to look forward to now.

Grocery Shopping Fast

I’m gearing up for a big challenge.  I’m only going to the grocery store once in October…at least that’s my goal.

 

It’s not unusual for me to go to the grocery store 3 times a week.  And sometimes, I’ve gone as often as 6 out of 7 days.  It’s a waste of money & time.  My goal has always been to go once per week.  I always think I’m getting everything organized & getting all I need…but I always forget something. Or I see a great recipe online that I have to try right away. 

 

Well, at least for October, I’m going to try to keep that from happening.

 

I’m coming up with a short exception list which so far contains only ice, milk & seasonal fresh foods.  We go through about 4 gallons of milk a month & I don’t have nearly enough space to store that much.  I made ice an exception for a similar reason.  Normally, we go through very little ice because I’m the only one who uses it for beverages.  However, the husband can go through a bag in a day or two if he has a sports injury…so I’m putting it on the list just in case.   The last exception is for season fresh foods:  I don’t want to miss one of the brief Clementine orange seasons so I’m going to check the sales flyers online once a week for this sort of thing.

 

I’ve decided (though I haven’t informed him yet) that the husband will be in charge of all exception grocery stops to keep me from yielding to any temptations.

 

The bigger challenge is coming up with an entire menu & stocking up on ingredients.  I’m planning for 5/dinners per week…though I’d be really happy if I ended up making meals 3 weeknights & once on a weekend.

 

I haven’t even started thinking about non-food items:  paper goods, cleaning supplies, etc. 

 

During the project, I’m hoping to create a spreadsheet of every single thing we buy at the grocery store.  I think it will make shopping a lot easier in the long run & I’ll have a better sense over time of budgeting & how long things last for us.

 

How often do you buy groceries?  Do you have any tips? 

Men In Tights

Boys, get ready for the next big thing in men’s fashion:  mantyhose. 

My thoughts on Fall TV so far

We’re just a couple of weeks into the fall TV season & here are my thoughts.  Notice that about 90% of the shows I watch are on Thursdays!  Where’s the justice?!?

 

Survivor Samoa:  Just okay.  Everyone is so mean this season.  They desperately need to showcase someone who has some redemptive qualities.

 

The Amazing Race:  Great start.  I loved the starting line elimination.  I’m already rooting for the Harlem Globetrotters team…mostly because they play the Globetrotter theme song every time they’re on camera.

 

Fringe:  I love this show no matter what…but it’s kind of off to a slow start.  Maybe it’ll pick up after Charlie dies.

 

The Office:  The husband was saying the other day that he’s kind of bored with The Office…I still love it though, even if it’s no quite as fresh & original as it used to be.

 

Project Runway:  Of course, this show is about midway through the season already but I thought I’d include it anyway.  I’m loving the contestants…the challenges not so much.  They’ve been way too easy on them thus far in my opinion.

 

Models of the Runway:  A lot of critics have slammed PR’s sister show about the models.  And it can be a little boring.  But the show often gives some helpful insight on the behind the runway goings on.

 

Dollhouse:  I have a love/hate relationship with this show.  It’s an intriguing concept.  But I think the characterization is really poor at times.  And the husband & I were so confused by the premiere that we may have to go back & watch a few Season 1 eps.  The good news is that our DVR will actually record Dollhouse this season.  Last season, the DVR inexplicably refused to record this show…which I always wondered

 

Numb3rs:  This was a great season premiere & one of their best episodes in my mind.  Everyone makes fun of me for watching this show.  But I really enjoy it & feel like it has improved every season.

 

Flash Forward:  I heard about this show but haven’t had a chance to watch the premiere yet.  The husband saw it & wasn’t too impressed.  Has anyone seen it?  Thoughts?

Food TV

I’ve never really been a food TV person.  I always feel like if I watch Jamie Oliver or Giada DeLaurentis I need to take notes during the episode & promptly make the recipe.  Also, a lot of food people like Rachael Ray for example, I find really annoying.

 

And I’ve never really been into the food TV competitions because the dishes are so unattainable.  I don’t even know what all the words mean. 

 

But recently, things have changed a little.  The husband likes Iron Chef America…which was news to me.  And I kind of enjoy watching it.  And I’ve started casually watching the current season of Top Chef to pass the time (am I the only one who finds Padma totally annoying & off putting?).  And I actually kind of like it though, unlike Project Runway, I really have no idea who the talented frontrunners are from the also-rans until they get eliminated.  Although I think at this point, they’re just eliminating all the people with really strong foreign accents.

 

And I still don’t know what “mole” or “ceviche” is.  Seriously, they show up in almost every episode.  Yet, I’ve never eaten or heard of these things.  How is that possible?

 

My favorite contestant is Kevin whose name I actually had to look up just now on the website because I call him “fat Sam.”  (he looks exactly like what I think our friend Sam would look like if he were heavy).  Anyway, I like Kevin/Fat Sam because he is from the south and occasionally makes dishes I’ve heard of like BBQ or potato salad.

 

Do you watch much food TV?  What are you into?  Any Top Chef fans?

Random Thought...

If I’m ever a boss, I’m going to install a secret camera to see what the office is like without me around.  I think a lot of bosses would be surprised at the placid, focused work environment the lack of their presence creates.

Name Calling

I really don’t like to blog about work because as we all know, people have gotten fired for it.  But I’m just going to go for it this once.  We’re going on about 3 months of insanity in our department –late nights, weekends.  Fortunately, it looks like the end may be in sight.

 

However, the whole thing has caused emotions to run very high and a virtual war to break out between several departments.  I’ve been frustrated with pretty much everyone involved at some point (and I’m sure that the feeling is mutual). 

 

But I’m pretty much over that.  However, there’s one person that’s kind of been bugging me for a long time.  And I just really want to let them know how I feel.  So I’m thinking of calling that person a name.  Now this whole work scenario has brought about no shortage of name calling & foul language.  But I’m too literate to resort to something so prosaic. 

 

But I’ve finally come up with something perfect.

 

At some point when emotions are high, I’m going to open my mouth & proclaim, “Person, you’re being a big doo-doo head!!”  It’s perfect.  First, it will make everyone within earshot think I’m a little bit crazy which at this point, I think would give me a leg up around this office.

 

Next, I think I have a reputation that could support plausible deniability if someone decided to take this up with HR.  Seriously, could you see the Miscellanist calling someone a name?!?  I don’t think so.  And even if they did, what kind of adult would feel secure going to the HR person and saying, “Misc. called me a doo-doo head.”  It’s like 1^st grade revisited.  It would be too embarrassing for a lucid person to confront.

 

Anyway, whether or not I actually go through with it, just imagining this awesome moment where I truly put my feelings out there is enough to get me through these long days.

Lo Mein

Last week, I had some dinner-making success with Beef Lo Mein. The recipe came from Amber via her TV appearance on Home Made Simple.  You can find the recipe here on her blog.

 

The recipe was quick and easy not to mention tasty. 

 

I took Amber’s advice & used hoison rather than oyster sauce.  We decided to go for the full 1 TBSP of chili paste…but I did add extra brown sugar & hoison sauce for more of a richer flavor.  Otherwise, I think it may have been a little on the spicy side for us too.

 

The downside to this meal is that I had to buy a lot of ingredients that I don’t keep around the house (hoison, chili paste, peanut oil, ginger).  But it’s definitely something we’ll eat again & again.

 

I think I might try more Asian-esque dishes.  I really like Asian flavors.  And dishes like Lo Mein which pairs those flavors with pasta might be a perfect melding for the husband’s & my tastes.

I'll have the boeuf!

Yesterday was our 1^st anniversary.  It was pretty exciting.  I’ve never had an anniversary before so I really didn’t know what to expect…but it was really great.

 

The husband took me to dinner at Le Central.  I’d been wanting to take him there for a while because I thought I’d like all the cheeses & breads.  Anyway, the restaurant was celebrating “Julia Child month” because of the recent movie release of Julie & Julia.  They had a special Julia-themed 4-course menu selection complete with Boeuf a la Bourguignonne which I’ve been wanting to try.

 

The boeuf was good…and less French that I thought it would be.  The special came with an artichoke appetizer…and it was one of the few times that I truly didn’t know how I was supposed to eat my food.  The menu listed it as Artichauts aux deux Facons (braised & grilled artichoke with hollandaise sauce).  I just dipped bread into the hollandaise which was good…not sure what I was supposed to eat off of that artichoke.

 

For dessert, I had Tarte Tatin (upside down apple tart with caramel sauce & ice cream) and that was pretty amazing.  However, after my 3 other courses, bread & sharing the husband’s appetizer, I was just about too full for it.

 

Two random facts:

• The French eat salad after the main course to cleanse the palate…I didn’t know this.
• Mastering the Art of French Cooking has never been translated into French…seems like someone would do it just for curiosity’s sake.